Thursday, February 17, 2011

Mommy Alchemy

♫ Halleluiah Halleluiah! ♪ After 20 years of dangerous and arcane experimentation (that has no doubt shortened my life), I have finally discovered the secret and magic formula to clean the filthy kid bathrooms!   

I can barely contain myself because I have been SO close for SO many years. I have suffered many failures and sacrificed many things (lungs, nasal passages, fingernails and various surfaces in the bathrooms to name a few).   Today I am going to share my discovery because I care deeply for my fellow man mom/maid and want to prevent everyone else from making mustard gas, napalm or using acetone in an attempt at a clean kid bathroom.

The simplicity of my formula is magnificent and truly humbles me after so many years of devoted fucking slave hood study in the art of cleaning.

Below is my magic formula-  When used in unison and precisely, the heavens open, the cleaning angels sing and it makes you prettier (ok, that "prettier" part is bullshit).

If you already know of this mystical formula- Shame on you for not sharing BRAVO!

Okay, so it's not Pb to Au, but in my world it's damned close!

Please share any magic formulas that you have discovered.


B said...

Be careful, how many batches of METH did you accidently create?

Bless My Bitchy Heart said...

Hahahahaha B! ;)