Monday, May 30, 2011

Bitchy Best & Worst & Comicon Survival


1.  School is officially out & alarm clocks are in the dumpster.

 2.   My 17 y.o. made it back safely from the PHX comicon. 

My boy Blake as Shotaro from Kamen Rider W. -(mmm...kay no one knows who that is)

 The Links from Four Swords Adventure (mmm...kay again, but kinda pretty)

 My Blake who met stranger poser Alice on the street at Comicon in PHX

 The NON poser Alice, aka Blake's mom. 
 Me & Blake a couple of Halloweens ago (That's how ya do it poser comicon Alice sweetheart)

3.  Hubster made it back from business in Geneva with chocolate.  Major hub points earned. 
 Yeah, it's empty, bite me. 

4.  Found a new favorite late night reality show – My Big Fat Gypsy Wedding.  *god forgive me, but it makes me feel SO much better about my own daughter*

5.  Super fun night at UFC night at Casino the other night.  Friend won $136.00 on nickel slots.  I lost almost as much on the slots, but money well spent I say.  

Not much bad the last few weeks.  But I will dig deep here, ummm:

1.  The sports bar at the Casino wasn’t serving food on UFC night for some reason, so we had to eat popcorn.  But on the bright side, we drank Bloody Mary’s which we now call "liquid salad".  So I think maybe that belongs in the best category.

2.  Youngest son -15 year old got a paper arrest for a curfew violation while walking home from a friend’s house.  (If under 16, home by 10 pm in my neighborhood or you go to Leavenworth).  But I felt so proud when the police officer said “You have a really good kid here, he is very polite, but here take this citation & pay the fine.”  So again, maybe that belongs in the best section-charming little shit.

The curfew violation certainly beats the hell out of the time my oldest son & his buddy decided to long board around the neighborhood lake in butt floss their junior year (about 2 yrs ago)….Thank YOU Johnny Knoxville.  

 A shrimpy lady police officer & a detective (that looked exactly like what a baby that Benjamin Bratt & Enrique Iglesias would make) came that time in a patrol car with my son, confiscated oldest son's cell phone.  Shrimpy lady police officer told me that my son was an indecent exposing pervert while I was wrapping my wet hair with a towel & tying my bath robe.  Luckily the detective, laughed & asked if my son & his friend had lost a bet or something.  So maybe again, the curfew violation belongs in the BEST category.   

Yep that's the actual banana hammock/butt floss that my oldest son & his buddy rode around our neighborhood lake in on their long boards (skateboards). 

Sunday, May 15, 2011

Random Bitchadoodles

Bitchadoodles, yep another new word.

* I finally realized that doing full makeup and hair and then having your plans wrecked is WAY better than unexpected house guests with no makeup and dirty hair.  The same applies to a dirty/clean house. I’m that weirdo that cleans my house AFTER the unexpecteds leave, like I can get a mental do over or some shit. 

* I love Facebook fights.  Yep, it’s true, I totally do.  Not being IN them, just watching them.  There is something SO alluring about reading people completely wreck their lives in a little bitty 1” x 2” space.  The other day while stalking one of my son's FB, I saw 2 of his skank female friends shred each other while fighting over a boy right out there on the FB wall.  Lots of mean name calling etc went on. Then girl #1 actually compared girl #2’s hoo hoo to an Arby’s Double.  I was HOOKED.  I stalked that effing profile all damned afternoon. I LOVE learning new shit. 

What are my favorite FB fights?  Total toss up.  Politics, family bullshit, bitch fights, bro code junk….it’s like trying to pick a favorite child…impossible…they are ALL awesome.

Admittedly, I’ve made beginner mistakes on FB in the past, like posting a few political opinions (I live in AZ, we are a hot bed for politics).  I watched my wall get hi-jacked once or twice & read some gnarly stuff while hitting that little X dealio to the right trying to delete the comment from my wall, then having people post "Hey did you delete my comment?” Ummm, no no, of course not, wow, that’s weird, where did it go? Bite nails, un friend, lock front door, hide under covers.  

However, I have learned a lot from all these shitty FB volleys.  Like never ever ever mention politics or eat at Arby’s.  Again, I love learning new shit.

* Lastly, I think the world will be a better place if wives kept a sharpie in their purse that matches the paint color of their car.  It can buy time ‘til the time is right.  You are Welcome.

 Please tell me about any FB or any other weirdness you have noticed lately.