Sunday, August 21, 2011

Skinny Jeans and Misunderstandings

Free Advice:

When an angry stranger mom & dad come marching down the side walk at 7 am on a Sunday & ask “Do you know where your son was last night?”  The WRONG answer is “Yes, he spent the night with his buddy so & so.” 

The RIGHT response is: “No because I don’t have a son. What? You caught someone that looks like us in your daughter’s locked bedroom this morning? Well that’s just weird.  But, if I did have a son that you saw pulling up his pants, it’s probably because he wears super low skinny jeans & is always pulling up his pants. Bye bye, have a nice day. Hope you find that bad boy. We’ll be on the look out. We certainly don't want the neighborhood going to shit."

My imaginary son is SO grounded!


Dazee Dreamer said...

hahaha. that imaginary son of yours better watch out. or better yet, you better watch out. sounds like a handful to me. :)

Bless My Bitchy Heart said...

Hahaha Dazee. Pretend boy is killing me. His pretend girlfriends are killing me too. His juiced up charm will be the death of me. I'm hoping imaginary older brothers will talk some sense into him. And imaginary dad is completely bi-polar on the issue. He can't decide between grounding or high fiving imaginary son....God help me.

B said...

Damn, you might have some imaginary grandkids pretty soon...jeez! I hope Drop Dead Fred is packing the plastic!

Bless My Bitchy Heart said...

Tee hee B! You crack me up! This story reads a bit torrid, but I know for a fact he is packing. I've laundered many (un-opened), along with flash drives & cell phones. I think he is still in the almost stages-simply because he is shameless & would probably tell the whole world otherwise. He is actually a great kid. I make him sound horrible, but he is my muse. I just wish he was ugly. It would solve all this nonsense.